I always thought the surfer or beach bum look was cool. After work, I used to wear all kinds of wild tank tops, tee-shirts, and Vans sneakers. I had half a dozen pairs of Zubaz genie pants for working out or for stepping out on the town.
Recently, I needed a new bathing suit and discovered a great deal on some O'Neil boardshorts. Surprisingly, I had never owned a pair of boardshorts and these shorts seemed to be calling my name.
I picked through the selection, looked inside, and realized there was no mesh liner. This troubled me since I believed boardshorts fell in the bathing suit category. I was surprised to discover there was no lining.
I immediately took out my smartphone and googled, "Do you wear underwear when wearing boardshorts?"
Seconds later, I had several answers and they all seemed to say the same thing, "...although some men wear boxers under their boardshorts, there is nothing worse than having wet boxers an hour after your boardshorts are dry. Don't worry, boardshorts are long enough that the wearer will not need to worry about anything being exposed."
This seemed to make perfect sense and I made my purchase.
Later that week, I was at a pool party and everyone was telling me how cool my shorts looked. After accepting many compliments, I excused myself to use the restroom.
I opened the velcro fly (another feature that seemed like a cool thing to have on a bathing suit) and then realized I was in big trouble.
Apparently, velcro has a nasty habit of clasping onto anything it touches.
After a long and painful lesson, I came to the realization that if a fifty year old man needs to google something before he wears it, he probably has no business wearing it in the first place.
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